"The Interview" Conspiracy Theory

Am I the only person who thinks that Sony "hacked" itself?

How can you take an otherwise bland comedy about a reclusive third-world country and turn it into an international "I've-gotta-see-it" sensation? I think the facts speak for themselves.

1. Does North Korea really have the infrastructure to launch a hack?
2. How else can you get the President of the United States to endorse a movie?
3. How can you get the FBI to finger the object of the movie?
4. Can you get the theaters where it was to be debuted on Christmas Day to pull it from their screens?
5. Rehash the movie in the media over-and-over again, by playing the blame game.
6. Decide to release the movie AGAIN in theaters, but, also, let's add an online release, through Google's YouTube and Apple's iTunes.

As I write this blog, I am on the verge of watching the movie online. Would I have watched the movie in theaters, otherwise?

Lord, no! I just don't watch movies in theaters. But I'm sort of interested in seeing what this movie is about, but not so much as I'd grace the doors of a who's-that-getting-a-blowjob-down-front, sticky, icky movie house.

Perhaps, Sony is testing the waters of the "at-home" audience for future reference.

I may be wrong, but I smell an international I Love Lucy-worthy publicity stunt! (That may just be working on me.)

North Korea

We've all heard a lot about this xenophobic little country that sits on the other side of the world. Its neighbor to the south has been threatened, along with the United States, with harsh militaristic tactics.

The threat of "nuclear" war is imminent, according to the propaganda machine of North Korea.

Kim Jong Un, the untested boy, who inherited his power from his father and grandfather, is trying to fill some really big (er...) shoes by picking a fight with the biggest bully on the block (i.e., the United States).

Here's what I think:

1. The Chinese aren't doing much to calm down the rhetoric spewing from the Korean Peninsula, which makes it harder to swallow for countries like the U.S., South Korea, and Japan.

2. The United States seems to be stirring in the pie, too, by sending in fighter jets to South Korea and beefing up its missile detection network in the Pacific. This only serves to encourage Kim.

3. If the United States is going to "up" the stakes, then it needs to make it a real life exercise. With the blessing--or disinterest of China--the United States needs to take care of business by either withdrawing its beefed up operations in the region; thereby, calling Kim's bluff. Or, simply carpet-bomb the little third world country back to the Chinese border, starting at the DMZ and pushing northward.

This would show them that the "boiled pumpkin" really does have teeth and knows how to use them. I know it is cruel for the innocent people who are stuck between a rock and China, but it really is the only way to give this little country a chance for any kind of new start in the international community.

I'm not advocating an occupation. It is more of a calling card: "Hi, we received your message and dropped by. If you want to see us again, just use our name on the television...or drop a note-in-a-bottle into the sea! See ya, Uncle Sam."

Kim Jong Il dead

South Korea reports that North Korea's leader, Kim Jong Il, has died.

Sarah Palin supports North Korea

In an interview, former Alaska governor and vice president candidate Sarah Palin declared her support of America's ally, North Korea.

She really should check her facts before she writes them on her palms.

Bill Clinton & North Korea

President Bill Clinton took it upon himself to secure the release of two American journalists, Laura Ling and Euna Lee, who had both been found guilty of spying and sentenced to 12 years of hard labor in North Korea.

The mission of President Clinton was successful, as North Korean leader, Kim Jong-il, granted the two journalists a pardon on humanitarian grounds.

This goes to prove that if you work with your enemies, rather than sit across the world and threaten them, you will get much more productive dialogue. This is the direction the United States was heading at the end of the Clinton administration in 2001. Unfortunately, these promising results were destroyed by the George W. Bush administration.

Did Bill Clinton make a promise to Kim? The White House adamantly says, "No!" I believe, however, that a degree of concession had to come from the Obama administration in order to release these two individuals. It wasn't done on purely humanitarian grounds.

North Korea's "satellite" launch

U.S. intelligence indicates that North Korea has begun fueling a rocket that the North Korean government states will launch a satellite into orbit. Does any country really believe the North Koreans have that type of technology?

Japan and the United States have mobilized naval and ground forces to deal with this launch, which they believe will take place between April 4 and April 8. Today, North Korea threatened Japan with the use of military force if it attempts to shoot down its rocket. Such an attack would be ill-advised to say the least. I believe an attack would only lead to the demise of a precarious North Korea.

The U.S. believes the North Koreans may be testing a multiple stage rocket that will have the capability of reaching Alaska and Hawaii. This test may be a precursor to a future rocket that can reach the western mainland of the United States.

North Korea agrees to disable nuke program

In talks with the United States, North Korea has agreed it would disable its nuclear program by the end of this year.

In exchange for the shut down of its program, North Korea will receive oil and other aid. South Korea has already provided 50,000 tons of oil to its neighbor, in July. North Korea hopes to receive 950,000 tons of oil, in all.

This announcement comes at the same time Iran declared it is ratcheting up its nuclear program.

North Korea Agrees to Stop Nuclear Program

In a stunning move--on the part of the Bush administration to talk to another nation--the government of North Korea has agreed to halt its nuclear program, and enter negotiations with the United States.

The only problem with this plan is the North Korean government only shuts down their nuclear program, and allows the IAEA into the country to conduct inspections, when they need money or food. Already, the Russians have confirmed that about $25 million have been transferred to North Korea because of their cooperation. In a few months, however, after they have filled their coffers, they will kick out the inspectors and resume their nuclear proliferation.

Sure, you can whet their appetite for money by throwing them a few shackles, but you draw the line until they have dismantled the program and the inspectors confirm that the program cannot be resumed, then you can release more funds to the government. In the end, simply turning the switch to off does not fully mean you aren't capable of turning the same switch on again at a time of your choosing.

Let's get real!

Posturing

Today, the United Nations Security Council voted unanimously to implement sanctions against North Korea for its nuclear test on Monday. What does it all mean?

It is simply more meaningless posturing by the United Nations. North Korea will not suffer anymore than it has in the past ten years under these sanctions. How can you punish a nation that already has nothing?

It's pointless and fruitless.

Nuclear Bombs & Ethics

There is something of irony regarding the North Korea issue. The United States is ardently opposed to North Korea possessing nuclear weapons; however, the US, as you know, has the largest stockpile of nuclear weapons in the world. In addition, the US is the only nation to have used nuclear weapons during a confrontation.

The irony is a bit like me telling someone the virtues of gun control while I have a large collection of guns in my home. Perhaps if the US took proactive steps of complete nuclear disarmament of its own stockpile, then other nations might be less likely to create this type of weaponry. After all, they refer to our healthy supply of nuclear weapons when we scream "foul!"

Just a thought for a Wednesday.

North Korea Acts

According to North Korean media outlets, the country has tested it's first nuclear device today. Although, the United States is unable to independently verify this fact, the South Korean geological society reported a 3.6 point "artificial" earthquake from North Korea, which probably means they did, in fact, test a nuclear test.

George W. Bush says the nuclear proliferation of North Korea will not be tolerated by the rest of the world. It would seem they are already doing well enough on their own without the rest of the world's permission.

Let's keep fighting in Iraq. We can't stop North Korea.

North Korea

North Korea says it may postpone the test of its first nuclear device if the United States will agree to direct bilateral talks, instead of posing unilateral sanctions against the nation.

Why doesn't the United States engage North Korea directly? What is the point of talking to one country through different nations? It's like when you were small and you said, "I'm not talking to mom...dad will you tell mom that I'm not talking to her." The funny thing is, mom is standing right in the room with you! That's how this whole "We're not talking to North Korea, except through China..." deal comes into play.

Bill Clinton's administration sought to directly engage the North Koreas. Secretary of State Madeline Albright went to Pyongyang and met with Kim Jong-il. This was a very large step of diplomacy for both nations and a great gesture of open relations with the North Koreans on the part of the Americans. What happened to this new relationship? George W. Bush is what happened.

George Bush's administration worked to undo all the work Clinton and his Administration had done. They returned to the indirect communication method and closed all relations with the North Koreans. What has that gotten us? It has gotten us a North Korea that is working tirelessly to build its own nuclear arsenal. It is creating tension on the Korean Peninsula and with the Japanese. It is giving China the upper-hand on dealing with this problem, because they are primarily the go-to-country for even speaking to the North Koreans.

If Bush was smart (and we all know he's not) and surrounded by equally intelligent, diplomatic people (instead of sycophants), then we might have averted this whole new North Korean tension. We might have followed the same model with Iran. The United States (Bush mostly) must get out of this mentality that we can bully other nations around and they will blindly follow along. We can no longer be the biggest, meanest kid on the school playground. Eventually, these little nations are going to gang up on us and give us a bloody nose. The United States is the world's oldest democracy. We have been in existence for over 200 years. From these many years of struggle and strife, we must have learned something of wisdom. The United States is in the best position of being the broker of genuine world peace; however, this can only be accomplished through direct talks with the parties involved. It must also take into account the art of compromise and the understanding that all parties have authentic positions on the issues at hand. It's not about one nation having the upper-hand on the other one. It's not about throwing around insults and insinuations. The United States must sit evenly at the middle of the negotiation's table and say, "This is what each party has brought to this discussion. Now, what can we do--with the things you have brought today--to find a balance to the issues and find commonality?"

That is called diplomacy!

Little Man, Big Worry

The propaganda on the American street is "Dear Leader" Kim Jong-Il, of North Korea, has some issues with his mind. The government, through back channels, characterize him as a loathing midget who is essentially an idiot. I dare say that is not true. True, he may not be the tallest man in the world, but he understands precisely what he is doing. He is provoking some attention for his faltering regime.

By test firing short range and long range missiles, Kim creates world interest in his country. He pegs himself as a world power, who deserves attention and respect. North Korea devotes almost 25% of its GDP (according to published US estimates) toward its military. That's a heck of a lot. You'd imagine they are developing something with that much funding. Of course, they are developing missile technology. They are developing nuclear technology in the form of weapons. They have a kick ass biological and chemical warfare program. In addition to their advancements, they have the fourth largest standing army in the world. That's not too shabby for a little country that inhabits half of a peninsula!

So in all fairness, let's give Kim Jong-Il the respect he deserves, even if he is cut from the same cloth as George W. Bush, a despot with megalomania.

North Korea Celebrates the Holiday with Its Own Fireworks

"North Korea test-launched a Taepodong-2 missile early Wednesday along with two short-range rockets, but the long-range missile apparently failed, U.S. officials said.

"North Korea's preparations for a long-range missile test have been closely monitored for weeks. A senior State Department official told CNN the Taepodong-2, which some U.S. analysts fear could hit the western United States, appears to have failed in flight.

"Military officials told CNN the long-range missile appeared to have failed less than a minute after launch.

"Two smaller North Korean missiles were fired from a different site shortly before the larger missile was tested, U.S. intelligence and State Department officials said.

"U.S. military sources said those two missiles landed in the Sea of Japan, one closer to Russia and the other closer to Japan.

"A senior State Department official said the launches were timed to coincide with the launch of the space shuttle Discovery from Florida, calling it 'a provocative act designed to get attention.'

"Analysts said the tests appeared to have been intended to draw international attention back to North Korea -- and to the stalled talks aimed at convincing Pyongyang to abandon its nuclear weapons program.

"North Korea is believed to have the capability to produce several nuclear weapons but has never tested one.

"'They are trying to send quite a signal not only to the United States but to the rest of the world that they should be taken quite seriously,' said Wendy Sherman, a former State Department official who held talks with North Korean leader Kim Jong Il during the Clinton administration.

"Washington and North Korea's Asian neighbors -- South Korea, China, Russia and Japan -- have been trying to persuade North Korea to give up its nuclear program since 2002, but those talks have stalled in recent months.

"Jim Walsh, a national security analyst at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, said the intent of the test appeared to be aimed at drawing attention back to North Korean demands in the six-party talks. But Walsh said the tests "do not represent an immediate military threat to the United States."

"'It's very difficult technology. They very clearly have not mastered it,' he said. 'Most estimates are they will not master it for another 10 years.'

"The United States, Japan and other countries have warned North Korea against a long-range missile test. The North Koreans fired a Taepodong-1 missile over Japan in 1998, but declared a moratorium on future tests in 1999.

"There was no official response to Wednesday's tests from either the White House or from Japan, which had threatened to seek economic sanctions against already-impoverished North Korea if it conducted a missile test.

"'One would expect from any administration for there to be sanctions, for there to be a tough response to this,' Sherman said.

"On Monday, North Korea's state-run media accused the United States of harassing it and vowed to respond to any pre-emptive attack 'with a relentless annihilating strike and a nuclear war with a mighty nuclear deterrent.'

"The White House has dismissed that threat as 'hypothetical.' But the U.S. Northern Command increased security measures at its Cheyenne Mountain Air Force Station in Colorado Springs, Colorado, a few weeks ago, a military official confirmed Tuesday.

"The base is the seat of the North American Aerospace Defense Command, and some of its command-and-control operations might be used if the United States attempted to use its ballistic missile interceptors to shoot down a Taepodong-2 test.

"But a Pentagon official said the missile appears to have failed on its own, without any American effort to knock it down.

"In other planning measures instituted in the past several days, Northern Command, along with the Federal Aviation Administration, has put standby commercial flight restrictions into place over Vandenberg Air Force Base in California and Fort Greely, Alaska, where U.S. interceptor missiles are based.

"President Bush warned last week that the isolated Stalinist state would face even further isolation if it launched the Taepodong-2, which U.S. analysts fear is capable of reaching the western United States.

"'The North Koreans have made agreements with us in the past, and we expect them to keep their agreements,' Bush said last month at the end of a European Union summit.

"'It should make people nervous when nontransparent regimes, that have announced that they've got nuclear warheads, fire missiles,' Bush said.

"'This is not the way you conduct business in the world. This is not the way that peaceful nations conduct their affairs.'"

Source: CNN

Bush talks peace

Today in Austria, Bush announced that North Korea's missile program "rattles nerves." He said that peaceful nations do not conduct business the way the North Koreans do. Okay, number one, I'm not sure what he means by that. You can't really consider the US a peaceful nation at the moment nor King George a dove of peace.

From his comments, North Korea may assume peaceful nations use violence to further their ends. They kill civilians in cold blood to quench their thirst for victory. Bush's advisors really need to stop and think about the message he is sending when he says those things. If I was Kim Jong-il, I'd be thinking, "Oh really, so that's how it's done!"

Another thing his advisors really need to work on is Bush's quirky nature of delivering a point. You know, the way he holds his hands out to the side next to the podium with his head cocked to one side with a smirk. That is more than pretentious and arrogant. How can you give advice on peace when you've destroyed a nation and you're standing their with a smug expression.

It doesn't work people.

North Korea

Should we be more concerned about North Korea? The US has activated its missile defense system in anticipation of a North Korea missile launch which could take place at any time.

It wouldn't surprise me if it was more than a simple missile with all these precautions. This missile is purported to have a range that could reach portions of Alaska.

Iran & North Korea

Bush is threatening Iran and Rice is threatening North Korea.

What are we going to do about it? Not a darn thing! We've got a civil war in Iraq that we started to deal with first.

Iran's Nuclear Program

The Russians were our only hope for hammering out an agreement with the Iranians for uranium enrichment. It seems that has failed.

Iranians turned down a compromise to have their uranium processed by Russians at a Russian location and then transferred to Iran for use as nuclear power.

It would seem the intent of Iran is not to have have a peaceful nuclear program. They are looking to become the next nuclear power in the Middle East. The United States has miscalculated the Iran-factor when it went to war in Iraq. Our forces are now engaged in a hopeless battle in Iraq as it fights a civil war. George Bush's "axis of evil" policy has failed. He allowed the two most powerful nations in this axis to slip through. Basically, I believe the US may have chosen the weakest member of the axis to make a point, which has only strengthened the military resolve of Iran and North Korea, while weakening our own!

Certainly, we will have to look to Europe to resolve the Iran issue; considering, the United States does not have the military presence and force to resolve the Iran issue unilaterally. Perhaps, China can keep North Korea in check. We can only hope!

Achtung! Achtung!

Last night, I was watching South Park on Comedy Central, when it occurred to me that Cartman's spoof on Adolf Hitler was exactly what is happening to us in the United States. Standing before the deer-eyed crowd, Cartman delivered a message that wasn't quite clear but it sounded super duper and the crowd agreed out of sheer ignorance to follow him and chant his anti-Semitic slogan (they though they were speaking Aramaic, like Jesus in the Passion) as the marched up Main Street, South Park, in front of Kyle's temple.

Okay, now you are asking, what the hell does this have to do with anything? But give me a moment....

That self-righteous Bush sycophant, now Secretary of State, has given the good word that Iran is next on Bush's chop. Now, that is a bit grandiose and arrogant, don't you think? Bush invaded Iraq and it is still a haven for terrorism and all-around hell hole, but he is ready to invade another,more stable, nation! What the fuck?! The disgusting part is most Americans will agree, but I have to interject my Hitler parable here....

In the late 1930s, Hitler set out to "unite" Europe under the brand of the Nazi emblem, and he said it was for their own good. It was for Austria's own good to return to the Fatherland, but what about Poland? Obviously, it was for their own good too! Basically, if you stood in the way of Hitler's agenda you were deemed an enemy and he destroyed you. France kow-towed before the might of the Nazi war machine, as Hitler's motorcade passed along the Champs d'Elysées in Paris, in order to preserve themselves and bide their time. Right!

The United States is now bringing "liberty" and "democracy" to the world. Too bad if you don't want, we're going to ram it down your goddam neck, so get over it, or die! That's the democratic way, right?

So, Iraq has fallen into the armpit of the world, thanks to King George. Iran is soon to follow...then North Korea. Wow! It sounds relatively easy, right? I don't think Iran will be so easily curbed as Iraq was. The Iranians I know would rather have a corn cob accented with jagged, rusty nails rammed up their ass before they'd give up one inch of their country for any reason, especially to a godless nation, like United States.

Is King George doing what is right? I don't think so! I think it comes down to one simple fact: if we go into Iran the United States Congress has to do what is right and proper and remove George's throne before we have our asses kicked by the rest of the world! Oh it can happen. Especially, if you are fighting a three-pronged war with an exhausted military (not to mention the war on terror! Whatever happened to that war?!).

Finally, I have to say thank you to the boys of South Park for teaching us all a valuable lesson! And thank you to Stan and Kenny for teaching us that the Passion wasn't that great of a movie! God, I thought I was the only person in America who thought this! Phew!